The Mask
I am not me! I wear a mask. And its not the same mask I wear all the time. The mask changes depending on the role I have to play. Its relative to time, place and people.I try to hide my real self. I try to be somebody else. I try to make an 'impression'. I try to live an image which I am not.
I don't remember how long have I been wearing the 'masks'. But I guess it must have been a really long time. Maybe from the time, I was learning to talk and walk. It wasn't my will. It was people's expectations. I was supposed to act 'perfect'.
So I don't cry when I want to. And I don't laugh when I want to. I hide my real feelings. Sometimes I agree with things which I feel are wrong.
A while back, when somebody said "You have changed. You are not what you used to be. I still like your former self", I was puzzled. This person had known me for a year or so. I don't know what I was a year ago or what am I today. I am sure there hasn't been much physical change in me during the year. So what had changed about me?
Most of the time I don't know what people expect from me. And sometimes I find it hard to live up to their expectations. And I don't blame them. I wish I had presented my real self to them.
I don't know if I will be able to throw off my mask someday. I don't know if I will be able to even recognize myself then. I have lost my real self somewhere. I know its within me. But can I find it?
It all sounds meaningless, but its because I am as much confused as this post.
Q. Why do I wear a mask?
A. I am ugly. Simple.
posted by m4magarmuch @ 11:37 PM
8 Comments:
I think most people wear masks because most people are afraid they won't be accepted. We are all hiding ourselves because somewhere along the line we learned an ideal that wasn't true and was impossible to reach and we all feel ourselves ugly.
Well, I find your pic quite delectable so there must be another meaning to the word ugly here. By the way, I loved Dil Chahta Hai! Thanks for your cool comments too.
Thanks Rachel, I think you are right. The world will be more beautiful if we all remove our masks.
Thanks Lexis, Well, I didn't know you are interested in Hindi films. I am amazed.
First off, you are not ugly. Secondly, have you read We Wear the Mask, by Paul Laurence Dunbar. that's the first thing that popped into my mind after reading your post. if not, go here
Thanks Shy for the link. I had never read this poem before, but it is really beautiful. Well...so I am not the only one who thinks like me. I am not alone. :)
Take away the masks and there is nothing left.Only emptiness.We behave differently with different people,i think that is natural and there doesnt really exist a "True" self.Perhaps there is this this image of ourselves that our minds posseses.I think that is what is perceived by most of us as being our true self.
But its not possible to act our so-called true self with everyone because in that case the "true" self will no longer be true. We cannot and should not act the same with every person.We dont make the masks,the masks make us.They are the natural state of social existence.I think there's something about this on my blog too.:),do read.
Thanks Sarath for sharing your views.
I have come to the conclusion that its better to hide behind a mask that to hurt someone. The only thing is that you should know who you are.
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